Rachael is the CEO/founder of Gather Labs—a vertically-integrated High Complexity CLIA lab focused on same-day diagnostics results.
Many of us in business have a startup founder friend (we may even be that friend) who is knee-deep in the process of launching or scaling their company and needs support; however, they may not know how to ask for this help.
Since none of us are mind readers, it can be difficult to identify how or when to properly support these entrepreneurs on their journey, which will inevitably be one of the most challenging experiences of their lives—one that only a select group of people can ever truly understand.
There are many stresses to founding a business.
Having founded multiple businesses, I can confirm that startup life can be both the most rewarding and the most stressful lifestyle possible all at once. It’s thrilling at the peaks when you see your hard work, sacrifice and dedication manifest into a thriving, profitable entity.
Conversely, the valleys are sometimes so low that you feel suffocated, stuck in negative feedback loops of self-doubt and questioning why you chose this path to begin with. And, almost without fail (despite new connections that can pop out of the woodwork while building a business), the founder’s life can feel deeply isolating and misunderstood.
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We, as human beings, need a village. We need trusted confidantes, motivators, and a community that can celebrate the roller coaster ride alongside us. To help illuminate how you can be that friend for the founder in your life, I’ve outlined some surprisingly easy starting points to support them in ways that can make a measurable difference.
Help them switch up their scenery.
Let me preface this point by filtering out two phrases no founder wants to hear, ever: “take a break” and “find balance.” Going all-in on a business idea often takes most of the founder’s mind and energy, which some may view as negative, but for us, it is usually an unavoidable, self-charging force. When working tirelessly to monetize your life’s purpose, working doesn’t necessarily feel like work; your brain unknowingly runs into overtime, and inspiration can come from anywhere.
Asking us to take a break from that may not be possible and often feels dismissive, tone-deaf or patronizing. We aren’t trading time for money. We’re racing to bring something intangible out of our souls and into the world.
It’s important to realize that weekends and holidays don’t hold the same promise for a founder as they do for a traditional employee. If we indulge in a full day offline, we’re left with less time to generate value for the company we’ve poured everything into. This is the double-edged sword of entrepreneurship that leads many to burnout and depression.
How can you help mitigate this and infuse new life into a founder’s week without distracting, minimizing, or sidelining their work? Take them out of their workspace. Help them change their scenery, even if only for a few hours. Offer up an activity that’s not related to their work where their mind can wander freely (or not at all).
Take them to an event, the ocean or a museum—something simple that allows them to reset and regain perspective without feeling like they’re neglecting their commitments. Sometimes, even a small outing can be the best possible support you can offer your friend.
Spark a human conversation (not an interview).
An entrepreneur’s life can seem thrilling, and a lot of people want to hear the play-by-play. There’s a reason Shark Tank is such a hit. People love to know about the next big ideas and innovations as they unfold.
But, as passionate as a person might be about their startup, they probably don’t want it to be the topic of every conversation. There are certain things we, as founders, cannot disclose. Yet, for some reason, onlookers often feel entitled to ask us deeply invasive questions—including financial and legal inquiries, which they’d never ask those with regular jobs—which can make us feel overexposed and as if they’re conducting an interview.
Instead of approaching your next conversation with your founder friend or new acquaintance like a reporter trying to get an exclusive, just chat normally. Discuss broader topics and try to connect. If a conversation is fruitful and organic enough, we will feed off your energy and likely open up in the process. But that shouldn’t be the end goal; a genuine connection should be.
Become an advocate (without asking for freebies).
One of the most consistent, measurable ways to support your founder friend is to advocate for their brand. Tell your family and friends about it. Share it on socials. Write a Yelp review or testimonial. See where and how you can cross-collaborate and make connections.
Word-of-mouth marketing is still the most authentic way to gain brand loyalists, and the right introduction can greatly enhance a startup’s trajectory. Find even one deliverable you can do to support your friend. But be mindful. If they’re launching a product or service that’s for sale, repress the urge to request a freebie. Make a purchase.
And, if you say you’ll introduce them to a potential investor or strategic partner, follow through. That introduction could potentially be a life raft that takes their business to the next level. The small act of sending that email or making that call when you say you will can pay off for all involved in dividends down the line. People rarely forget the connector or catalyst that helped change their lives.
You can be an authentic and supportive friend.
We all know that startup life is a long and complex road. Founders work tirelessly to get their businesses off the ground and will often feel lonelier than ever in the process. As a supportive friend, you can enhance their peace of mind by helping spread the word—and helping them get away from the chaos when necessary.
Be authentic and be there for them when they need you, especially when they don’t know how to ask. Founders truly treasure those who are supportive and understand the demands of their chosen path.
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